How far should I take it?

Are you in a situation where it feels like all you do is fight, push, and strive, yet the scenario doesn’t improve or change?

Let’s consider an example: Marina lives and works in Brussels, holding a good managerial position at a financial company. Her mother, who lives in Madrid, fell ill more than two years ago, and since then, Marina has been trying to get permission to work remotely so she can move back to Madrid and be near her mother. Every time she tries, her boss gives the same response: “company policy doesn’t allow it,” although Marina is aware that exceptions have been made for colleagues in other departments. She has spoken with Human Resources, her boss’s manager, and has even resorted to pleading for permission to work remotely from Spain. She’s had no success. She feels frustrated, undervalued (why them and not me?), exhausted, and deeply demotivated.

Another example: Pablo is stuck in a marriage that isn’t working. They’ve given it many chances, attended therapy for months, and his wife has asked for a divorce multiple times, but Pablo refuses to accept it: “It has to work.” What is preventing Pablo from accepting the situation?

In these cases, when we are aware that all possibilities have been exhausted, we need to understand why we remain stuck. The reasons can be many: fear of change, fear of facing reality, fear of making a tough decision, etc. The key lies in truly understanding your priorities and acting accordingly.

Sometimes we find ourselves trapped, fighting for relationships, jobs, friendships, family… and the situation doesn’t change. Perhaps it’s you who needs to change your perspective. Try answering these questions:

• How do you feel about this situation?

• What is most important to you regarding this situation?

• What have you done so far to improve it?

• Do you see any possibility you haven’t tried yet?

• If not, why do you think you keep fighting?

• What do you think is holding you back from accepting that the situation isn’t going to change?

  
  

It’s tough to realize that no matter how hard we try, sometimes things just don’t work out. The key is to understand why we continue to live the situation from a place of frustration, anguish, anxiety, disappointment, etc. Sometimes we can choose another path, and other times we have no choice but to remain where we are.

If we have options, why keep suffering?If, after analyzing the situation, there are no other options, the task is to accept it. It’s in your hands to decide whether to keep swimming against the current or try to flow with it.

Fighting for what you want is a growth-oriented attitude. Fighting for what you want at the cost of your peace, happiness, self-love… only wears you down. Fight for what makes you feel good, and remember, you set the boundaries.

Image by Freepik

Melinda Sánchez Coach

www.melindasanchezcoach.com