If it doesn't bring you peace, it's not your path

Life is a journey in which we are “supposed” to enjoy and learn as much as possible. And I say “supposed” because sometimes the situations we encounter prevent or make it difficult to enjoy, learn, or grow personally. Other times, it’s ourselves who put up obstacles—sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously. Today I’m going to talk about how to connect with your inner self to see if you’re on the right path, to achieve a life where you can feel peace with yourself and tranquility.

In many of my sessions, I see people who talk about life as a real burden: work, children, family… “I have no time,” “I have no energy,” “I have anxiety”… When I hear these responses, my question is: What do you really want? In response to this question, many people just look at me, disoriented, as if they think I don’t understand anything. “Well, I just do what I have to do…” Some say, and others look at me puzzled because in their minds, the option of things being different doesn’t even occur to them. On occasion, a question arises: But do I have any choice?

Unfortunately, we believe that our life has to be a certain way: because there’s no other option, because it’s what I’ve been taught, because it’s what I’m supposed to do, because that’s what others do… I’m obviously not talking about complex situations like illness, loss, etc. I’m talking about situations where you decide something in a certain way because unconsciously, we believe and give strength to ideas like: I have to be more, I have to be successful, I have to…, I have to…, so we accept this “obligation” without analyzing what it means for us and how aligned it is with what makes us happy or brings us peace.

Our natural state is a state of peace and serenity, which we’ve increasingly forgotten. Life is becoming a constant stream of stimuli and “shoulds” that lead to a state of permanent dissatisfaction and stress. Many of the decisions we make are related to those “shoulds” dictated by society or, in some cases, our own beliefs, but deep down we know that it doesn’t make us happy.

Here are several examples. After each one of them, ask yourself the following questions: But does it make you happy? Does it bring you peace?

I’m still with my boyfriend, who makes my life impossible, but at my age, who else am I going to find? I’ve changed positions; it involves much more responsibility and more money, but I don’t see my kids because I don’t have time. I can choose between several majors to study, I love psychology, but in business administration, I have better opportunities to earn money. Many times we justify what we do or the decisions we make because “they’re not that bad…” In other words, we prefer to do something or be with someone because it’s not so bad instead of opening ourselves up to the opportunity of being happy.

Really, what gives you peace? I invite you to make a list of things or situations that make you happy, give you peace, and bring you tranquility. What makes you feel good? What makes you vibrate? If your daily life has little to do with this list, ask yourself and reflect on whether you’re on the right path. What can you do to be closer to the things on that list? The intention is the first step to having a different outcome… something will need to start changing.

Remember, only if it gives you peace is it your path.

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Melinda Sánchez Coach

www.melindasanchezcoach.com