What does happiness mean to you?

When I ask this question: What does happiness mean to you?, most of my coachees take a moment to think before answering. If I were to ask you this question, do you have a clear answer? The way we perceive happiness shapes our daily lives, our expectations, and how we savor life.

Usually, we don’t spend much time reflecting on happiness; it’s not a constant in our daily lives, almost as if happiness were reserved solely for big, extraordinary moments. The lack of awareness about what makes us happy turns happiness into more of a concept than a tangible reality.

When we tie our happiness to external factors, achieving those things often creates pressure and anxiety. For example: When I have enough money, I’ll feel more at peace. I need my family to be okay so I can be okay. If I get a different boss, I’ll be much happier. This reliance on external circumstances—things over which we have little control—can lead us to feel dissatisfied.

Take Eduardo, for instance. He’s a father of a large family with a good job, but he works long hours, often coming home late and stressed due to the pressure his boss puts on him. Even so, Eduardo tries to manage his anxiety and bad mood when he gets home, aiming to spend some time with his family. When I ask Eduardo, What is your idea of happiness?, he pauses before replying: Having time, having peace, being healthy, and knowing my family is okay. Those are his first thoughts on happiness. But when I follow up with, Eduardo, what makes you happy? he thinks again and says: Spending quality time with my wife and kids, enjoying a good ice cream, walking in the sunshine on cold days, reading.

The first question seems distant to him, but the second one connects directly to what genuinely makes him happy—more specific, personal things that bring a smile to his face as he lists them.

There’s a big difference between the abstract concept of happiness, which we often perceive as distant, and the things that truly bring you happiness. The latter usually consists of simple, tangible moments that are easier to reach.

So, what makes you happy? I encourage you to reflect on this and, being realistic, make a list of the things that bring you joy. Clarifying this and bringing it into your conscious awareness makes happiness more tangible and present in your life. Revisit your list from time to time to internalize it further. Once you know what makes you happy, you’ll consciously seek it out and experience it more intensely.

Happiness isn’t guaranteed, but getting closer to it might be within your reach. Why not give it a try?

Image by Freepik

Melinda Sánchez Coach

www.melindasanchezcoach.com